oh how i have fallen. this has been a weird year for me. i'm looking in the mirror everyday, and although the physical features remain the same, the carriage and perspective of the face staring at me are unrecognizable. when i was home two weeks ago, it was the first time in a looooong time that i felt like myself. and this brought to the forefront of my consciousness how far i am from my goals, and the true extent to which my past has quagmired me. looking through some old emails i am reminded: the highest compliment i've ever received was from this guy i interned with two summers ago. one of the most passionate, empathetic, and driven people i've ever known, it's because the words came from him that they meant so much to me. one evening he had been walking along dupont circle and come upon a homeless looking man staggering on the street- ghastly pale, wide eyed, and gasping for breath. the pedestrians who passed him averted their eyes and quickened their pace. he wanted to help, but didn't know what to do. '...i tried calling you, but you weren't home', he told me later, 'so i tried to think of what you would do in that situation.' i've not thought of this in a long while, but it gives me hope. something i needed today. to excavate the remnants of my former attributes trapped beneath memories, fears, and circumstance. here's to a year of regaining my momentum, to rebuilding myself to who i used to be. posted by testimonies 2:02 PM Add a comment . . .
